Bring on the hits!

For all those that haven't noticed, there is this nondescript site counter at the bottom left corner of the post on my main page, right below the 'power blogger' button, that tells me the number of hits I have on my site.

The site meter also goes on to explain the various details of all the people that have chanced upon this blog, the location they're in, the time they've stuck onto this page, and so on and so forth.

I know you're yawning, but read on, this post gets interesting.......

Firstly, a small request, bring on the hits! More power to blogger, and more readers on whom I unleash my blog. Thats it with the shameless self-advertisement for this post.

Secondly, another small request...do subscribe to the RSS feeds, but please, please do visit the site too, so that "the site counter hits the roof", to use an extremely popular expression that I came up with three posts ago.

I have, for the first time since installing the site-meter, actually clicked on the link and I have seen a lot of vague places that I have got hits from. For all my international readers out there, I will now move on to leaving personalized messages, so that you keep coming back for more.

To my single reader from Taipei, Taiwan:
Me speake Englishe too. Me speake lotsa languageses. Me want to bomb mainland China if they repeate the 1962 War scenario. Me fully on your side. Me shalla tone down me grammal for your leading preasure!

To the two Aussies and the New Zealander who must've accidentally stumbled on this site:
Dudes, I know you're CIA operatives who've just flown from Langley over to Auckland and Brisbane just to prove that you're some random surfers, while actually trying to see if my blog is a recruiting ground for the News Channel that flicked the name off my blog. For the last time, I am a inconsequential software engineer who's probably going to stand at attention everytime one of your relatives who is probably working in a major IT company in the bay area snaps his fingers. Don't bother. Stop wasting tax dollars. Use it instead to buy more duct tape for George W when its really going to matter.

To all the European people that visited this site:
I am not an anti-Semite, and shame on you if you are ! You cannot find links to Ashtanga Yoga classes that Pattabhi Jois conducts in Mysore, though I hail from that place. It doesn't matter if you're so hot that you're contributing to global warming, I will still not be able to help you. Send me a pic though, and I might...just might reconsider. Contact me at bogus_email_address@sitedoesnotexist.com.

To all my readers from the US:
I know you all are Desis. The present generation of Yanks can't read for nuts. The present generation of American kids want to outsource their attendance requirements to the poor village student in Byratanahalli. (Imagine, the spelling bee finals without Desis would have had them spelling the "mass" in mass destruction, for the top prize!)
The CIA operatives fly to Australia and New Zealand so that they can hoodwink me into thinking they're not really interested.
Keep the flag flying high! Jai Hind! Pump in more dollars into our economy through FDIs and FIIs, and raise the level of our GNP. Yeah, baby!!
Also, lets gun for a second generation immigrant grandson of a Desi to be the 63rd President. Thats much better than whats happening currently, with George W Bush cost cutting on his speech writer's pay packet by hiring Laloo's speech writer, with only a poor translator converting the speech from Bhojpuri to English. Outsourcing is here to stay, lets take it to their shores!
Also, since your poorer cousins back in India cannot afford iPods at the prices that they're being sold here, please do get one each time you return to the motherland. Vinayak Kamath, my iPod getter, my many thanks to you once again.

To those in the middle East:
Go here. For the very last time, I will not accept Osama's tapes. I don't give a shit about terrorism. PLEASE treat your women better. (I see more women flocking my site now...click that firefox "go" button to reach my URL. Go baby!).
Please get this clear - Camel is the ship if the desert. Clemanceau is the deserted ship.

To those in Africa:
What the hell!! I thought you didn't have electricity there!!! (There are actually no hits from Africa!)

To everyone in India:
Well, high speed internet access at your company surely rocks. So does your taste in blogs. I commend thee for that. Kutz, thanks for the link on your blog. You've quadrupled the number of my readers. Now there are 8 people in our country who actually access my blog.

To my Dog:
grr-woof-woof...grr grr-rowf (I will get your favourite dog biscuits next time I come home to Mysore, sorry for the delay).

Thanks, and hope you've had a good read.