by the beard of the Prophet!!
A good friend of mine, after reading my blog, (which I so shamelessly advertize because I want the site meter hit counter to hit the roof), said that I am not fit to be a political critic, because of what I wrote about the freedom butcher, and his nefarious activities.
He mentioned that if Calvin were a political critic, this is how his blog would look like. *More shameless self advertisement, that!*
If blogging be the in-thing for shameless-self-promotion-without-a-cause, read on.
The convtoversial depiction of the Prophet's cartoons have ruffled many an unkempt beard. The kind of saliva and froth that all the hard-liners and clerics have generated, berating the Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten, and all the other news papers that have committed this sacrelige, is enough to fill the Dead Sea twice over.
In case you haven't checked out the cartoons, I suggest you google at your own risk to find out. If I didn't know it was the Prophet who was being represented there, I probably would have thought it was some random vague cartoon, of someone depicting the Arab stereotype, probably some super-rich Sheikh who had enough money made from camel butter to fund terrorism and maintain an entire harem at each oasis where he'd pitch tent, at the same time!
Jehadis martyr themselves in the hope that they get to make sweet love to virgins in heaven, after having sacrificed their lives for blowing themselves up, and a lot of fun was made of this aspect of their school of thought in the cartoons!
Judging by the way they're conking themselves out, I think its quite a distinct possibility that the Supreme One might have approved the proposals by the development authorities there to construct a separate Martyr's heaven, (which will be an absolute replica of the current one, with one exception - auto hymen-repair wands sold at wholesale prices) so that their bawdy fetishes can be satiated far away from all those people that dilligently follow all the rules to get there.
In short, customer satisfaction is probably rated very highly in the after-life too, considering how viable its becoming for people to want to get there.
Karl Marx once said "Religion is the opiate of the masses". Guess he didn't assume his off-hand statement would mean so much and more in the present day scenario. There are religious fanatics everywhere, for every single religion that exists on the planet, with Buddhism and Jainism probably being the most notable exceptions.
Hail to the Bodhisatva, and to all the Jain Tirthankaras.
Coming back to where I think I started off from, most people have this favourite expression which goes "By the beard of the Prophet", something I came across first in a Tintin comic. I am filled with wonder about how something as sacred as the beard of the Prophet can be spoken about so openly by each and every person who knows the expression, and use it for the most trivial of things.
"Mom, I swear by the beard of the Prophet that I have not enrolled in the Islamic Jihad as their official human landmine detector. I just lost my legs playing football when someone tackled me hard!"
Hazrat Bal, in our very own Kashmir, supposedly houses a single hair on the head of the Prophet (though he is always turbaned, and might be bald for all its worth it!), and such a storm was created in preserving the shrine and its sanctity, thereby ensuring that the terrorists who were holed up inside could relax there for a lifetime, if only their supplies lasted that long.
The Indian commandos supposedly were more careful here, as compared to the way in which they executed Operation Bluestar to bonk off Bhindranwale, or how they managed to rescue people at the Swaminarayan temple in Gujarat, and yet, you have everybody having the chutzpah to talk openly about the Prophet's beard. Isn't that blasphemy?
Trey Parker and Matt Stone (creators of South Park, for those who came in REALLY late)probably don't have fatwas issued against them because nobody in the middle-east is cool enough to simultaneously be a hard-liner cleric and appreciate South Park at the same time. Or maybe, its just possible that since these two gentlemen are berating all religions all and sundry, nobody is criticizing them.
In the 30s, when the Jews were depicted as being hook nosed, wearing frock coats, with ringlets around their side burns, and extracting money from the poor Christians, nobody seemed to bother. In fact, the typical stereotype of a Jew till date remains as that of someone who is extremely cunning, and someone who is, in all probability a stingy money lender, who goes all out on the day of the Sabbath, just because its the only day of the week that his missus is obligated (yes, according to the Torah) to give him any.
If the Muslims want to take revenge on the Christians, the best thing that they could possibly do is to use their eye-for-an-eye, chop-hand-for-theft rule, and draw cartoons of Jesus, and Jehovah, and all the apostles, and St.Peter and God himself only knows who else.
The only problem that I see with this approach is that a whole lot of people would probably say "been there, done that." Nobody can make as much fun of the immaculate conception as Trey Parker and Matt Stone did (them again!), and you should probably check out this link, again at your own risk.
http://www.lyricsdownload.com/south-park-the-most-offensive-song-ever-lyrics.html
Humour is an essential part of life, and without it, our lives would be mundane and repetitive, boring to the max. A lot of catastrophic things would happen, if humans didn't value humour. Douglas Adams would not be revered like he is now. FRIENDS would be a porn serial (which is not so bad, if Matt Le Blank (sic), David Schwimmer and the third guy whatzizname were thrown out of the picture to make it a lesbian orgy), Sex and the City would live upto its name literally (also not a bad thing), and most vitally this blog would have ceased to exist.
For all those that dispute the last statement, I have nothing to say. I refuse to waste my time trying to come up with an insult for such....well...see, I refuse to waste time!
Finally, nobody makes fun of the blacks the way they themselves do, and no brother reading this blog is ever gonna get offended by this (borrowed from Stanley Kubrick's Full Metal Jacket):
How do you stop five brothers from raping a woman?
Throw them a basketball.
Until next time....
He mentioned that if Calvin were a political critic, this is how his blog would look like. *More shameless self advertisement, that!*
If blogging be the in-thing for shameless-self-promotion-without-a-cause, read on.
The convtoversial depiction of the Prophet's cartoons have ruffled many an unkempt beard. The kind of saliva and froth that all the hard-liners and clerics have generated, berating the Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten, and all the other news papers that have committed this sacrelige, is enough to fill the Dead Sea twice over.
In case you haven't checked out the cartoons, I suggest you google at your own risk to find out. If I didn't know it was the Prophet who was being represented there, I probably would have thought it was some random vague cartoon, of someone depicting the Arab stereotype, probably some super-rich Sheikh who had enough money made from camel butter to fund terrorism and maintain an entire harem at each oasis where he'd pitch tent, at the same time!
Jehadis martyr themselves in the hope that they get to make sweet love to virgins in heaven, after having sacrificed their lives for blowing themselves up, and a lot of fun was made of this aspect of their school of thought in the cartoons!
Judging by the way they're conking themselves out, I think its quite a distinct possibility that the Supreme One might have approved the proposals by the development authorities there to construct a separate Martyr's heaven, (which will be an absolute replica of the current one, with one exception - auto hymen-repair wands sold at wholesale prices) so that their bawdy fetishes can be satiated far away from all those people that dilligently follow all the rules to get there.
In short, customer satisfaction is probably rated very highly in the after-life too, considering how viable its becoming for people to want to get there.
Karl Marx once said "Religion is the opiate of the masses". Guess he didn't assume his off-hand statement would mean so much and more in the present day scenario. There are religious fanatics everywhere, for every single religion that exists on the planet, with Buddhism and Jainism probably being the most notable exceptions.
Hail to the Bodhisatva, and to all the Jain Tirthankaras.
Coming back to where I think I started off from, most people have this favourite expression which goes "By the beard of the Prophet", something I came across first in a Tintin comic. I am filled with wonder about how something as sacred as the beard of the Prophet can be spoken about so openly by each and every person who knows the expression, and use it for the most trivial of things.
"Mom, I swear by the beard of the Prophet that I have not enrolled in the Islamic Jihad as their official human landmine detector. I just lost my legs playing football when someone tackled me hard!"
Hazrat Bal, in our very own Kashmir, supposedly houses a single hair on the head of the Prophet (though he is always turbaned, and might be bald for all its worth it!), and such a storm was created in preserving the shrine and its sanctity, thereby ensuring that the terrorists who were holed up inside could relax there for a lifetime, if only their supplies lasted that long.
The Indian commandos supposedly were more careful here, as compared to the way in which they executed Operation Bluestar to bonk off Bhindranwale, or how they managed to rescue people at the Swaminarayan temple in Gujarat, and yet, you have everybody having the chutzpah to talk openly about the Prophet's beard. Isn't that blasphemy?
Trey Parker and Matt Stone (creators of South Park, for those who came in REALLY late)probably don't have fatwas issued against them because nobody in the middle-east is cool enough to simultaneously be a hard-liner cleric and appreciate South Park at the same time. Or maybe, its just possible that since these two gentlemen are berating all religions all and sundry, nobody is criticizing them.
In the 30s, when the Jews were depicted as being hook nosed, wearing frock coats, with ringlets around their side burns, and extracting money from the poor Christians, nobody seemed to bother. In fact, the typical stereotype of a Jew till date remains as that of someone who is extremely cunning, and someone who is, in all probability a stingy money lender, who goes all out on the day of the Sabbath, just because its the only day of the week that his missus is obligated (yes, according to the Torah) to give him any.
If the Muslims want to take revenge on the Christians, the best thing that they could possibly do is to use their eye-for-an-eye, chop-hand-for-theft rule, and draw cartoons of Jesus, and Jehovah, and all the apostles, and St.Peter and God himself only knows who else.
The only problem that I see with this approach is that a whole lot of people would probably say "been there, done that." Nobody can make as much fun of the immaculate conception as Trey Parker and Matt Stone did (them again!), and you should probably check out this link, again at your own risk.
http://www.lyricsdownload.com/south-park-the-most-offensive-song-ever-lyrics.html
Humour is an essential part of life, and without it, our lives would be mundane and repetitive, boring to the max. A lot of catastrophic things would happen, if humans didn't value humour. Douglas Adams would not be revered like he is now. FRIENDS would be a porn serial (which is not so bad, if Matt Le Blank (sic), David Schwimmer and the third guy whatzizname were thrown out of the picture to make it a lesbian orgy), Sex and the City would live upto its name literally (also not a bad thing), and most vitally this blog would have ceased to exist.
For all those that dispute the last statement, I have nothing to say. I refuse to waste my time trying to come up with an insult for such....well...see, I refuse to waste time!
Finally, nobody makes fun of the blacks the way they themselves do, and no brother reading this blog is ever gonna get offended by this (borrowed from Stanley Kubrick's Full Metal Jacket):
How do you stop five brothers from raping a woman?
Throw them a basketball.
Until next time....
posted by Hari Shenoy @ 5:17 AM
2 Comments:
hahahah!!!!
Hahahahah!
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